“One day, you will tell your story of how you’ve overcome what you are going through now, and it will become part of someone else’s survival guide.” – Brene Brown

I have struggled with depression many years back. Though it was undiagnosed, I was aware of my signs and symptoms. I credited that to my nursing education. At that time, I felt so helpless, unsure, and alone. At some point, I even wanted to end everything with my own hands. I guess I was just lucky enough to know that what I was suffering from was already depression.

Being a nurse helped. I knew what to do to make myself feel better. Instead of taking the struggle alone, I opened up to a few trusted people. I carefully selected those I know won’t judge me and my reasons.

Unfortunately, not all people have the same knowledge and training I had. Not all of them know how to take care of their mental health. Not all are lucky enough to have the same conviction and support I had.

But, do you know what truly kept me going?

First is my faith in God. I wouldn’t have survived it without Him. It was during my darkest times that I totally felt His presence and love. That even when I am alone, I knew He was there with me. That’s faith. Believing in someone and something even when you are still unsure of what the future holds.

Faith is as important as the breath we take. It makes us hope for a better future, for the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s making us hold on to the tiniest piece of thread that keeps us hanging on in life. So, do not ever lose that faith. Pray and be open to God’s help. He’ll surely send support by providing you with people and situations that can lift you up. All you have to do is believe and open your heart to Him while being patient for a better tomorrow.

Second, the thinking that it is only me who can help myself. While it is true that support systems such as family and friends are essential, the battle was mine alone. I could only heal if I wanted to heal myself. I could only survive if I wanted to survive. It was a real struggle and a challenge, especially when I would always think that setting myself free from it all was the only way out.

But then, I thank God that I am still here. Though life still throws me a lot of problems, I realized that they are what make me stronger and resilient. God never gives problems we cannot deal with. We have to do our best to tackle it, and God will do the rest.

Third, it also helps to know one’s purpose. I am still unsure what my actual purpose in life is. Every day I open my eyes, I always think of what’s in store for me. I have many dreams, yet I am still far from reaching them. Thus, I take it one day at a time. I begin to discover new things about me that may – or may not be – my purpose in life.

For now, I am able to write. Writing has helped me express my feelings and open up to the world. It also helped me share my thoughts and ideas in the hope that they can be helpful to others.

As I always say, life is a constant battle. I can never be assured that depression would only knock once on my door. Tomorrow, the following week, or even years from now, it can come back and haunt me again. However, what keeps me motivated is the fact that I beat it once. Thus, I’ll beat it again should it ever come.

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